You know, I never mind having a man in the shower with me, especially if I can con him into shaving my legs. However, when it’s Archangels or my guys in astral form, it isn’t quite the same – ya know? It’s always more fun to grab onto someone solid.
I wasn’t going to blog anything today – but after my angelic shower visit, I figured I’m supposed to.
As I’m shampooing my hair with some Lavender shampoo, I hear Archangels Michael and Raphael arrive. I hear them tell me — you have to save him. I “know” who they are talking about, but I had to ask anyways….who and why can’t he save himself?
He’s self-destructing — cannot stay afloat any longer without you. He cannot fall.
I rinse my soap suds off and sigh. Ted — I know you’re talking about Ted. What do you want me to do?
Save him – Archangel Michael says in a very commanding voice.
I don’t know how – I say.
Yes you do – Archangel Raphael replies. In your heart, you know.
I – WANT – TO – SCREAM…but I don’t as that would alert my household and then it WOULD be far too crowded in my small bathroom.
I can feel a hand on each of my shoulders and it is said in unison – love him.
How do you expect me to get to him?? Bill isn’t going to help, that’s getting pretty obvious. He doesn’t need to hit me upside the head again for me to get it.
The Archangels and I launch into a long conversation after this – so long that I run out of hot water. Ted is on a one-way ticket for destruction – it’s as simple as that. He has too many women in and out of his life and he drinks too much. Bill is an island. He wants to come and go as he pleases, with no ties to a relationship, only many friends. What I can’t get – is if he wants friends only, and Ted is like a brother to him, why wouldn’t he do what he had to do in order to save him? Even if that meant feeling uncomfortable by picking up the phone and calling. Yes, we have been doing the telepathic link and it is strong between us – but it is going to take a materialized phone call to get things moving.
Ted longs for that physical connection that his soul craves with me. He needs that eternal love. He and I made a pact to meet up in this life and this is something that his soul knows…and it hasn’t happened. So he gets over the emptiness by the revolving door of women and shuts out our telepathic connection (which he is starting to think that it’s all in his head) by drinking.
If I look at my life, I’ve led the same destructive pattern until about when my son was born. Which is the same time I found out about Bill and Ted. So I am to assume that my soul has known the same thing as Ted’s soul. I’ve had my share of disaster choices in men, in the same revolving fashion and if I were single now….who knows? Plus, Lord knows anyone that has known me from before my son was born knows that I’ve been one hell of a drinker. Not an alcoholic, but I sure love my beer. I partied hard – and often.
So – now the task at hand is — how to get to Ted without Bill’s help? I still cannot believe that Bill would sit back and watch a friend that he loves self-destruct. The pull I can feel from Ted is all consuming – it’s strong — He-Man strong. I know Bill can feel what I can. I just don’t get it. How can a man who I know to be so loving and kind be such a self-centered prick right now? I can understand the why — I just don’t get the why – if that makes sense to anyone but me.
You know, I try so hard to focus in on other aspects of myself, my life, my work and spirituality. But I’m always yanked back in to Ted and Bill. Always. I wish I could cut a break, I wish I could get some help — earthly help — to get us together. Why can’t it be as obvious to others that us three have to get together. I mean, there has to be someone who reads this blog who knows who Bill and Ted is and can help. I find it hard to believe, if not impossible, that there isn’t someone. The world’s too big – too many people….and we all know the saying, “It’s such a small world”.
So what to do — what to do? This is my dream question for the night. I can’t help but think it has something to do about my writing. I’m too tired to think about this any more tonight. Or to ponder more on what the Archangels said. Bottom line is that I have to get to Ted.